I know that “Monday” isn’t necessarily linked to “happy” for many people. In fact, some may even find themselves counting down to Friday. That’s been me with my current career. I was counting down to Friday, dreading Monday. That’s such a crazy way to end up living most of your life right? Wishing the days would pass? We aren’t defined by our careers (even though our society really wants us to feel like we are) but what we choose to do most of the hours of our day really contributes to our health and happiness. I consider myself a joyful, madly in love with life, type of person, so why was I allowing myself to feel locked in by doing something I didn’t love to do?
The obvious reasons, of course, such as finances and obligations, but it was also the feeling that I had worked so hard at a degree and for a career that didn’t fulfill me. That’s a hard reality to reconcile with because the one thing we don’t ever get back is Time. That time could have been spent with me obtaining a degree, a certification or experience in a field I do love. That being said, I am working on not looking at those years as a waste of time. They provided me with a career in a field thats always growing, a career I can find a job in nearly anywhere I go, a skillset that is unparalleled and actually also helps me be a better Mom. For that, I’ll always be grateful. And I understand that its a luxury to have the choice to step back from it, too.
But it’s a choice I have to make now. And it’s up to me, and its scary, and its exciting, and it’s so many things. You see, by nature I am a multi-passionate person, which can get me in trouble because I want to try e v e r y t h i n g and it makes me less likely to commit fully to just ONE thing (my husband excluded!) I want my life to look like a few different things, and I have no interest in doing one thing my whole life or living in one place my whole life. etc. I need evolution. I crave it. I don’t know what the next stops on the way to career fulfillment are, but I have to take the first step. It’s a journey and maybe it won’t end up meaning I’ll give up what I’m doing completely, maybe it will, but all I know, is that I have to leap into it whole heartedly and accept that whether I fall or rise, I tried. At least I tried.